Category: Let's talk
To those who are complaining about my lack of expansion on certain topics, ...right now I cant bring myself to care.
.................
To those who will in all probability manipulate this tragic situation for their own amusement..you are not worthy of my interest and/or time ...On Friday evening we lost our child to be, so please if you can manage it, lay off for a while
Hi Alex,
I am so very sorry indeed to hear of your loss...
Thots of strenght I send to you and Ardeth
Connie
Well, my man. That's truly awful, but at least you have one that is healthy and alive and that's an awesome thing, concentrate on the positive things and here's wishing you can get through those hard times.
AS hard as it is for you, use all your energy to confort your partner, it's got to be even worse for her.
Best wishes
-B
hmmm cliches..
well there is that but right now I cant focus on anything...
well, whatever then.
Alex, I don't even know you, apart from a few correspondences back in the days of hotbraille, and there can't be many things less helpful than words of sympathy from some anonymous sod on the internet, but... I can't even imagine what you're going through, but for what it's worth? I'm thinking of you. I don't see how anyone could fault you for being distracted, beannachdan ort, Errin
Thankyou Errin I really appreciate the kind thoughts and the gaelic...
Goblin I feel for you both. I've experienced it, so, I do understand. No words that can be said can comfort you, but try to think of this. I'd give anything to have a healthy baby. You have something some would do anything for...*encouraging smile*
Thankyou Witchcraft and the sad thing is I can't bear to be near Alasdair or Louis,even the sound of their voices just tears me to pieces...but they need looking after so its grin and bear it...cheers pal..
I'm sorry Goblin...Take care of yourself and I'll be thinking of you.
Caitlin
I feel for anyone who suffers a miscarriage. unfortunately, miscarriage is very common though. 1 in 6 pregnancies ends in miscarriage before 12 weeks gestation. the instance of miscarriage is so high in that period, that most people refrane from announcing they are pregnant until after they have passed the 12 week period. After this time, the instances go down to just 1 in 100. and most people who suffer a miscarriage go on to conceive again and have a healthy pregnancy.
Yes those cold hard insensitive facts are always helpful, I remember thinking the same thing at the time
Quite right SB, perhaps Goblin was a bit premature announcing this pregnancy errrm what was it, around two weeks after conception?? A little hard to believe I think you'll agree.....
I beg to differ about someone announcing a pregnancy prematurely. I'll announce mine, if it ever happens. If something goes wrong I'll deal, but I didn't tell anyone last time, and there for had no one there to support us when we lost her. Besides, I'll be to happy to hold that kind of excitement inside...So, I'll announce it immediately, as soon as it's confirmed...Again, if it ever happens...
well wc I agree to an extent the excitement is tremendous and it is natural to want to tell someone, immediate family, close friends, but that is where most people draw the line, as, the more people you tell, the more people you then have to announce to if you lose the baby. As you know you were expecting a girl I'm guessing you were beyond the 12 week risk period though, as the baby's sex does not actually begin to show until 12 weeks, so by the time you sadly lost your baby you would have been in a lower risk category for miscarriage anyway and most people would have shared the news by then so would have had to tell the world they had lost the baby.
I don't know how to tell anyone the words just won't come when I'm face 2 face...worse still is the fact that my brother's in Russia and is due home on the 11th I'm dreading telling Ally
Nah, don't you remember SB, it was Valentine's Day wasn't it? They found out then but the baby was due 9 months from the beginning of February...hmmmm? Well that already doesn't add up and then knowing the baby's sex by the end of March makes it even more wierd....don't you think?? Awwww what will Ally say......
well no to be fair goblin hasn't indicated that he knew the sex of the baby, the person who knew the sex of a baby she lost was in actual fact witchcraft. You're right though in saying it wouldn't be possible to know the sex of the baby - the sexual organs do not begin to develop until after 12 weeks - although it is possible to find out through genetic testing, but such testing is not carried out on babies who are miscarried so early, unless the mother has suffered multiple miscarriage (multiple being considered more than 3 miscarriages).
We were just past the "danger zone", if that's what it can be called. However, that time we told no one do to some problems we were having in comfirming it, but we've now tried for so long... I wish that kind of pain on no one.
Hi Goblin, i'm sooo sorry to hear of this. as WB says, try and be positive! I can't imagine what you'd be going through right now but there would certainly be a lot of emotional crud to deal with.
And Can Everyone just stop being so judgemental and try and not figure out every little mistake Goblin has made and use it against him? Those of us who haven't gone through it will never know what it's like. so, please, let's all just be friends and move on from the past.
thankyou Rd I'm trying to be positive but its just too hard you'know and sadly the crud seems to be a permanent feature ....cheers pal..
Not meaning to take sides, but is this really the place to be crytical of when and how people announce pregnancies?
It just seems a bit insensitive.
Just a thought,
Erin
It is if they're lying about it yes...
It is if they're lying about it yes...
We do not know what went on between you to, if anything. but surely we can move on. Goblin is trying too.
And how do you know it was lied about? Were you there? Just curious...
I know because I had a long association with Goblin on another message board and in the end almost everything he posted on there turned out to be untrue. Even to the extent that he would log and pretend to be his 'brother' Ally who may or may not exist. He thought that if he posted in a Scottish accent we would all be fooled....I think the worst one was when he logged on as 'Ally' and said that 'Alex' was in hospital having his eye removed and then after he was banned from the site 'Ally' claimed that 'Alex' had tried to commit suicide...But you are right I should move on and I will but no, Goblin is very trying indeed, but is not trying to move on, he is trying to wreak the same havoc here that he did at eyes2 and you all just fall for it every time.
I haven't fell for anything. I'm not there beside him, so, I can't say if what he says is totally true or not, but then I'm not there with you, so, the same remains. *smile* Just as no one is here with me and can't varify...Well, none currently in this conversation. Though I wouldn't lie like that, I'm aware there are those who do, but to assume someone is lying could be fally...Urg, I hate that word!!! Anyways, my point is, we're not there, therefore, we don't know what is going on.
I'm sorry but I feel I need to say this, if not for Goblin's
sake, but for the sake of the human soul.
some believe that a baby is not a baby until it's born, or until a heartbeat can be heard, or until the enfant shows up on a fetal monitor.
I belief, and of course, this is my own believe, that a soul is a soul, a life is a live, whether or not it is visible, or breathing on it's own, or audibly crying, it's a human being.
So, noone, should diminish what Alex and his family are going through. It's a tragedy no matter what, and yes, maybe he should be thankful he has a living child, as I'm quite sure he is and that no one need tell him that! But you know? Sometimes people just can't hear that after losing someone. They are grieving
Think about this one.
If one of your parents were to suddenly die tragically, how would you feel if someone said, well at least you still have your mom or dad. Well if it were me, it would rightly piss me off, if not frustrate me.
And yes, maybe he will have more children, and does have one live child, and maybe many pregnancies end in a miscarriage, maybe that's not what Alex needs to hear right now, but of course this is the zone, and of course everyone has the right to their own freedom of speech, as do I, and not knowing Goblin all that well, I'd like to give my heartfelt condolences to both you and your wife
Take care,
Lisa
here here, charis! And goblin we've never even spoken before as I don't come on here much any more, the reasons for that I'll keep out of this post. However I'd like to extend my condolences to you and your wife also. Take care, and please know that there are people out here, who do actually care and who's thoughts are with you at this time.
I don't have anything to add to all these poasts except one thing: there are two beings that know when a person is lying, God (and that is if you believe in one(, and yourself. No one should judge, because we don't know for sure. If you don't believe in a god, well, I guess only you would know if you are lying or not. Anyway, my deep condolences to you Goblin. I'm sure it's hard, but you will make it. What doesn't kill you will only make you stronger, and if it doesn't, it can make you bitter, but hopefully you won't become that. If you do, It's very understandable. Some things happen, and we question, but all things work together whether we see why or not, I believe they do. Take Goblin. You will be in my thoughts and prayers. I.C.
What would arouse more sympathy and emotions of pity, than the announceent of someone dying. And if that someone is a baby, well that creates an even greater effect, doesn't it?Unfortunately, the truth is that Goblin knows that and he uses such announcements every once in a while to bring attention to himself. It is like the boy who used to cry 'WOLF' as a joke to see the whole village run to rescue him. Only after doing that many times, no one came to his rescue when a real wolf appeared. Let myths be a lesson, and let you all be a bit wiser because Goblin has found your buttons and he is pushing them!!! Star
I don't think you are totally correct there. Goblin is a different person yes, but we shouldn't judge him. I mean good grief! A misscarriage could happen to anyone. That's life. I know Goblin knows how to push buttons, and he is obviously pushing yours. So, if you don't want your buttons pushed, then, stay away from his poasts. If he is lying, well, I can't stop that, and neither can you. So, don't worry about it. This is the internet. Anything can be fake. We all need to be careful, but this pushing buttons is crazy. Goblin might be a very upset person at this point, wich he is. So, if you don't want your buttons pushed, stay out. I'm okay. I'm not letting anything get to me. It's obviously getting to you though, and as I've said twice, if you are bothered by it, Well, Stay out. You keep putting yourself in these positions. Don't do it. I'm just saying. Sorry for the rambling.
It is not me giving him words of sympathy or defending him. He obviously found your button, cause look who is defending him, not ME! If you knew Goblin you would know he is only upset when he DOESN'T GET ATTENTION! If he really wanted to be left alone to greef he would have stayed away from the boards not come here to announce it. A person who is hurting is not one jumping on a public stage with a loudspeaker announcing his sorrow... Star
I have done it. I'll admit it. Sometimes I've written things so I could feel better. That's how I know. I'm defending him because you're talking about him. I'm not gonna let anyone stand on their own and let someone just run all over them truth or not. Someone must defend them whether they are right or wrong. I'm just saying don't worry about it. It shouldn't be such a big deal. So, he wants attention. Whatever. I still don't see the big deal.
I was stating my opinion, you began making a big deal from that by wanted to defend someone you don't really know and not wanting them to stand alone whether they are right or wrong blah, blah, blah... who is exactly making a big deal out of this, huh? Star